It usually requires a type of vulnerability to really write a blog post. I struggle with FEAR and the fact that God not only has gifted me but that He wants to use me.
"O God, you are my God; earnestly I seek you; my soul thirsts for you; my flesh faints for you; as in a dry and weary land where there is no water." Psalm 63:1
Earnestly= serious in intention, purpose or effort or sincerely zealous
I have dropped the ball lately, I have not been earnestly seeking Jesus. But I want to.
Please raise your hand if you have experienced some dry and weary patches on this fun journey of life. Please raise your hand if you have realized that you haven't been hungry or thirsty for the Lord, where you feel like you have "lost" your appetite for God's word simply because you were not getting an answer every time you played bible roulette.
Sometimes its when you have had your fill of the day, burdens are heavy, your exhausted of always chatting about the negative and horrible things that are taking place at home or work. Sometimes my quick fix is just to sing a few worship songs on the way to work, but even then I struggle with walking in fact that I am saved from my sin, I have a Savior who loves me beyond and or that God cares enough to give me rest. Which clearly the scripture states that He will give us rest if were are weary and heavy laden. Sometimes we need to STOP BLAMING GOD and actually talk to Him, we need to be vulnerable with God. Sometimes that also means letting others know about you in order to keep you accountable and directed back to Jesus and His goodness. That means that fellowship is sooooooooooooooooooooooooo important to maintain a healthy relationship with God. Fellowship is meant to encourage and become that functioning body of Christ. Without fellowship in our lives as Christians, I believe we are limiting the opportunity to be met by God.
Guilty as charged. But there needs to be an attitude of repentance and an attitude of humility as we desire to be more like Jesus.
I want to be the woman of God that so desires God and all His goodness. I want to be the woman who desires God above my own desires for a husband and children. I want to the confident woman who stands and claims the gifts God has given me, to sing my heart out for the Lord. I want to be the woman who stops wondering if I'm good enough for someone to even say Hi to or to find me worthy of their time. I want to stop questioning God and His timing. I want to be the woman who gives all she has and values nothing other than her Saviors sweet thoughts towards her that are good, that are plentiful. I want to be the woman who glows with the hope and joy that she only finds in Jesus. But mostly, I want to REST in His presence, close my eyes and dwell in the beauty of His majesty.
I want to bring my Abba Father, my heart and watch Him make beauty from ashes.
I challenge whoever is reading this to pray specifically, to earnestly seek Jesus daily and to love others like Jesus loves.
Thank you for loving me.