Wednesday, September 21, 2016

Earnestly seeking

It usually requires a type of vulnerability to really write a blog post. I struggle with FEAR and the fact that God not only has gifted me but that He wants to use me.

"O God, you are my God; earnestly I seek you; my soul thirsts for you; my flesh faints for you; as in a dry and weary land where there is no water." Psalm 63:1

Earnestly= serious in intention, purpose or effort or sincerely zealous

I have dropped the ball lately, I have not been earnestly seeking Jesus. But I want to.

Please raise your hand if you have experienced some dry and weary patches on this fun journey of life. Please raise your hand if you have realized that you haven't been hungry or thirsty for the Lord, where you feel like you have "lost" your appetite for God's word simply because you were not getting an answer every time you played bible roulette.

Sometimes its when you have had your fill of the day, burdens are heavy, your exhausted of always chatting about the negative and horrible things that are taking place at home or work. Sometimes my quick fix is just to sing a few worship songs on the way to work, but even then I struggle with walking in fact that I am saved from my sin, I have a Savior who loves me beyond and or that God cares enough to give me rest. Which clearly the scripture states that He will give us rest if were are weary and heavy laden. Sometimes we need to STOP BLAMING GOD and actually talk to Him, we need to be vulnerable with God. Sometimes that also means letting others know about you in order to keep you accountable and directed back to Jesus and His goodness. That means that fellowship is sooooooooooooooooooooooooo important to maintain a healthy relationship with God. Fellowship is meant to encourage and become that functioning body of Christ. Without fellowship in our lives as Christians, I believe we are limiting the opportunity to be met by God.

Guilty as charged. But there needs to be an attitude of repentance and an attitude of humility as we desire to be more like Jesus.

I want to be the woman of God that so desires God and all His goodness. I want to be the woman who desires God above my own desires for a husband and children. I want to the confident woman who stands and claims the gifts God has given me, to sing my heart out for the Lord. I want to be the woman who stops wondering if I'm good enough for someone to even say Hi to or to find me worthy of their time. I want to stop questioning God and His timing. I want to be the woman who gives all she has and values nothing other than her Saviors sweet thoughts towards her that are good, that are plentiful. I want to be the woman who glows with the hope and joy that she only finds in Jesus. But mostly, I want to REST in His presence, close my eyes and dwell in the beauty of His majesty.
I want to bring my Abba Father, my heart and watch Him make beauty from ashes.

I challenge whoever is reading this to pray specifically, to earnestly seek Jesus daily and to love others like Jesus loves.

Thank you for loving me.


Sunday, September 18, 2016

Late as usual

I wrote this post a few months ago, meant to post it but kept putting it off.  So here is late as usual and still being renewed in Jesus. : )

There is this lovely area near tower 52 in Newport Beach, that is perfect for placing a towel down and cracking open a book. Not a lot of people in the area and the only noise usually is the sound of crashing waves and the occasional hooray from the surfers. Perfect weather on a  March 2nd afternoon, with a large soy latte from Peet's and silence.

Today my day off,  I ventured to the beach and placed my towel down and sat in awe,  just taking in the beauty. After looking around, I grabbed a scoop full of sand and broken sea shells. So many of these shells so soft and smooth. Unique in shape, color and size. All once whole shells that lived at the bottom of the sea now washed up and made their home on the shore. The sand has smoothed any rough edges and made them into another beautiful creation.

Many times I feel as though my edges are being smoothed, my rough character is being shaped and my heart is being softened. Many times I don't give Jesus the recognition, and most times I don't feel as though I need to be softened. I mean, l love Jesus, I don't have a hard heart, or do I? If I never see the damage of sin in my heart, than I will not see the need for a Savior.

I notice how I react to situations, how I act out of fear or how I lack the small portion of faith to move mountains. The process isn't pretty and the realization that I am more and more like the people that I tend to complain about just reminds that I am in constant need of Jesus. I have been so blinded by the fact that I am always in need of smoothing out and reshaping.

I seek to be like Jesus but forget that I need to be challenged in my understanding of His character and my faith in the unchanging, the loving and the everlasting God. As much as I see others need to be exemplifying  the character of God, i too need to be refined. I can't begin to tell you how much I fear the unknown. I fear what will take place this year or how I will adapt to a new moving of His mighty plans. Just this past monday, yet again the Lord spoke truth in my heart and opened my eyes even more to how little I see God and how BIG He really is.

Do you ever go to God with minimal requests instead of going to Him with a big request?
Deep down in my flesh I really question that God is able to do above and beyond my greatest desires. I mean it says in His word, why do I doubt?

"Whatever you ask in my name, this I will do, that the Father may be glorified in the Son" John 14:13

or what about

"Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you, For everyone who asks receives, and to the one who knocks it will be opened." Matthew 7:7&8

I love that Jesus seeks us, He meets us, He seeks to know us. Are you actively seeking Jesus and all that He has for you. Are you blinded by the inability to understand God? I know I am at times.

"O God, You are my God; I shall seek you earnestly; My soul thirsts for You, my flesh yearns for You, in a dry and weary land where there is no water." Psalm 63:1


"You will seek ME and find Me when you search for ME with all your heart." Jeremiah 29:13

I love how the word of God is filled with so much love for His children. I love how Jesus loves me and has great plans for me even though I feel like a broken sea shell without a home.

I love to be encouraged and I love to encourage. Praying Jesus will guide you, meet you and continue to reveal Himself to you.

- Mis